Eggsactly


In this session I would be inflicting another random idea on you. Yes you! But before we start I would like to confess that this post is a result of the absence of anything being put up on similar lines since a long time. (Did that sentence leave u confused? Read on) And I would further like to clarify that it is neither my wish nor intention to subject you to what i call “post traumatic post disorder”. Anyway I guess the tittle might have given you guys a hint about what this is going to be on( actually I am sure you guys have no clue where this is going..well neither do I). So lets see what we end up with here.

The problem which this post shall try to address immediately is an ancient one. Many a sage and wise-men have pondered upon it and the problem itself transcends all culture, ideologies and geographies.That fundamental problem is ……………………….

What came first? The chicken or the Egg?

Before we start it is customary to introduce the subjects of the problem first. But since I think everyone knows what a chicken and an egg are I shall move on.(Though if you are really that dumb you can click on the hyper-linked text. And if you really really are that dumb you would not realize that its actually just underlined text and would go on clicking.)

Although a preliminary and satisfying solution states that whatever you place the order for first comes first, it obviously is not satisfactory to the intelligent such as yourself(seriously! stop clicking “chicken” and “Egg”).

Based on our deductive reasoning we believe that it was indeed the chicken that came first. Even though Darwin might have come to the same conclusion based on his theories, the approach we use to arrive at our conclusion is radically different. Our studies into the dynamics that would control the coming of the chicken or the egg helped us understand that this problem was interlinked with another which was as old and equally fundamental. I am sure now it would have dawned upon you all the problem that I am referring to. It is indeed the great question of why the chicken crossed the road. Though the answer to this question is of extreme importance, it is actually the question itself that sheds some light onto the subject of whether it was indeed the chicken came first. It is reasonable to argue that if a question “Why the chicken crossed the road?” is as old as “What came first? the chicken or the egg?” it clearly shows that the chicken came first. This is because of the fact that if at all the egg did come first there would have been a similar question w.r.t the egg. Clearly there is none. Also once we have established that it was indeed the chicken that came first,it may also be extrapolated that the chicken might have crossed the road to lay an egg on the other side.

<Abrupt end???>

The answer, of course is No <wigs signing back in, after a rather long hiatus>. There’s more for you to ponder upon. Don’t you want to know if the sole question behind this post (asking if the chicken came first or the egg) is valid? How would you feel if I told you that the very assumption behind this discussion, the vary basis that the chicken comes from the egg and the egg comes from the chicken was false? <intensify background music, much like in the film Independence day> What if there was an alternate answer to that question. Life is full of them. Life is all crap, and so is this post. However, we cannot ignore the fact that we might be thinking of something that is based on a false pretence. So face it. Do you know if the chicken came from the egg or if the egg came from the chicken? The answer will blow you off!

Let me explain how with the help of a neat flow chart (long live good ‘ol Microsoft for having invented MS office, and more so importantly Microsoft CLIP ARTS – I owe a lot to them, and I claim no rights over any clip art of theirs I might have used – they all belong to Microsoft Corporation). Back to our serious discussion (much like in Tamil masala movies wherein there’s a comedy scene right in between two serious make-or-break scenes). We do know that an egg comes from a chicken. But the truth that will shake you out, the truth that will make you shit bricks, the truth that will make you give away all you’ve believed, is that a chicken does not come out of an egg. It is a chick that is born out of an egg, and not a chicken. Now you might rotate your head like Eric Cartman, going “No…,” but shake out, wake up and understand the simple ‘flow’ of things:

Simply explained

So now I’m sure your very faith in humanity has been lost. You might want to stop me with an Eric Cartman like “Noooooo,” which he uttered when he imagines a world in which he must speak in minority slang, is paid lower wages, and eventually forced to live in a confinement camp.

<the real Abrupt End>

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4 thoughts on “Eggsactly

  1. shreshtha says:

    you knuckleheads..
    the egg cant COME unless the chicken CUMS..so there ..mystery solved..short and simple..sexlogic its called

  2. Vichar Hari says:

    Reminds me of some equilibrium reaction which we studied in 11th or 12th 😀

  3. Shailendra says:

    let us approach the eternal question the way Darwin would have. The egg that came first was from a chicken that was not a chicken as it was brave enough to venture into the big bad world and try out various methods to ensure that it was in a position and status to lay an egg. Hence it was the egg that came first. I know teaching this to you scientific folks is like carrying coal to Newcastle or as they would say in India ulte baans barielly le jana. Never the less I will pull rank and still preach to you guys whether I make sense or not as actually I am just practicing how I will write my blog this year. It is a part of my new year resolution which as all of you will know are meant to be broken

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